Pity Party Pitfalls

"...I do not have a mother." - Our World Vision sponsor child's sister.

Last Fall, Scott and I decided to sponsor a World Vision child. We decided we wanted to sponsor one who had similarities as Haley so she could have something in common with the child. We chose a little girl who lives in Bolivia. She lives with her father and her 5 other siblings. Her mother passed away soon after she was born. She has the same birthday as Haley, only a year younger. She also loves dolls, like Haley. Her name is Blanca. In December, we sent her a care package with some crayons, coloring pages, stickers, a letter and a picture of our family. Yesterday, we received a letter back from her sister (since Blanca is 3) and a picture of Blanca with the package we sent!

The letter said, " Dear Sponsor, My sister is so happy for all the things you sent her. She is happy for all the presents. You are so nice with my sister. She is fine. I like the presents. I do not have a mother. Thank you." ....It completely caught me off guard that the little girl put that in the letter. I already knew of her mother's passing, but it just surprised me that Blanca's sister felt like that was something of importance to put in the letter. Not how the weather is, not what their favorite colors are, not their favorite game...

Lately, I've been having pity parties for myself since my Dad passed away. It is sad to face all of life's events without him and I'm dreading many special times in mine and my family's lives. I should be able to find joy in some of these times, however my joy is overcome with grief. On one hand, I feel guilty being happy and I feel guilty for being sad. Instead of living in the moment and appreciating the moment for what it is worth, I am always struggling internally with these feelings.

When I got this letter yesterday, my heart just broke for these children. These children not only live in horrible conditions and are the poorest of poor, but their family is broken by the loss of their mother. I feel like that was God's perfect timing to show me that (1) I'm not alone in my sadness and grief over losing a parent and (2) I had so many wonderful years with my father - these kids will NEVER know much about their mother. So, stop having a complete pity party!!

I'm glad God lead our family to Blanca. I never thought I could have something in common with a 3 year old child from Bolivia, but God knew that we both would have hurt and a piece of our hearts missing over a lost parent. My prayer is that through the letters, I can express my care for loss as so many of you have for ours.



As Mother's Day approaches this weekend, my heart and mind are on kids like Blanca who don't have many memories of their mother. I'm so blessed to have had many wonderful years with both of my parents. Although my Dad is no longer with us, I have his memories which I will cherish forever.

If you don't already, I encourage each of you to consider sponsoring a child. Consider World Vision or Compassion International. Pray about and it ask that God lead you to a child that you can connect with. God's hand was all over our match with Blanca and I pray that you can find a child that can bless your life as much as you will bless theirs!

Accounting for This Life: How do you get through your own pity parties in life?